Euphemisms

[Remission]

So when a girl offers to give you her number, saying, 'You want my number?' or whatever, does she really want you to take a note of her mobile number, or is she wanting you to make a full-on move on her already?

I cannot understand women ....

Well, I can understand them when they aren't interested in me/disgusted at me ... but I can never interpret correctly when (or if) they are being affectionate or sexual.   This is why I am such a chronic masturbator. 

[MM]

If mrs palmer and her five daughters are not satifying you there is always the local brothel maybe you should be getting there numbers

[Remission]

If mrs palmer and her five daughters are not satifying you there is always the local brothel maybe you should be getting there numbers

I have considered it, but the only worthwhile hookers cost a pretty penny.   

[Felgen]

I have considered it, but the only worthwhile hookers cost a pretty penny.   

Try escorts. I've never tried one myself, but many of them are very beautiful. They don't charge 200 bucks for a three minute blowjob either.

[zenemu]

Or alternatively, you could just try having a conversaton with a few women and see where it leads. If you have problems doing that, practice.

[Remission]

Or alternatively, you could just try having a conversaton with a few women and see where it leads. If you have problems doing that, practice.

I actually really want to and I know that women will like me ... I am sincere ... now when I go out, for example, at night into town, I see so many girls who look great, and I feel excited, sometimes euphoric, sometimes a little bit anxious ... it is a strange kind of feeling, I feel good being surrounded by people, but when I think about trying to talk to them, my mind becomes weird, like I am falling through space or into a bottomless void, it is very confusing ... now I know that ordinary conversation is not 'difficult', and simply smiling and laughing and listening goes a long way, but there is some obstacle there ... some kind of feeling of inferiority or fear ....

So I look at a young woman, and when I see her breasts, for example, I fall into a trance, into a state of extreme contentment, but the will to simply talk to her doesn't assert itself, or isn't there ... yet this is what I would have to do to achieve my aims ... when I see a pretty girl it makes me so happy, but I am thinking so far ahead, to the ultimate act of sex and all the attendant worries (performance, whether she will like it, whether it will be awkward, whether she will want it etc) ... so I am, like, always three steps ahead of myself, worrying about the sex even before I've taken the first steps to get to know her.

It is like ... I am seeing the big picture, but not the small print ... the forest, but not the trees.

But let me tell you something ... I love women, very much.  But I cannot tell between a woman who is interested or one who is just friendly, one who is playing hard to get and one who isn't interested at all, one who is trying to get me to seduce her and one who is annoyed at my looking at her ... I can't interpret people's emotions and intentions properly.

And this you see is why I got diagnosed as autistic.  If I could understand people I would have a sexual and social life and I wouldn't be here. 

I am good to look at, and I even get girls hollering at me in the street.  When I think about girls who have thrown themselves at me in the past, and I didn't know what to say, I feel tempted to retreat into my beloved pleasures ... like wanking ... I masturbate and close my eyes and dream of women, and it feels very good indeed.    But nothing beats the intensity of a woman's body.

[Remission]

I think about sex in the way that neurotypicals think about chit-chat.  It's a 'get to know you' kind of thing for me.  Sometimes it can be meaningful, just like talking; sometimes it can be something fun to pass the time, just like talking.  I like to be physical; I like to be hands-on; I like girls, I love girls.   

[zenemu]

I daresay I am going to regret this post, but anyway...

In almost every single post you make ridiculous and faulty assumptions, which simply point out that you fail to relate to the similarities between men and women and completely miss the differences at every turn.

Many adults with AS do tend to have sexual behaviour that would be more appropriate for a teenager, it is a well documented phenomenon, but that doesn’t make it acceptable. The sooner you learn to address the above, the happier you will be. Sadly I suspect you will focus on this paragraph, which is the least important and feign insult rather than thinking and learning. That is your choice; I don't really care nor do I have much else to say on the subject.

[Remission]

I know what you mean, but after so many years of being miserable, now I am feeling better I just want to have a little bit of fun and recapture some of my lost youth.    Once I've had some fun I can start getting serious.

If girls want to be mean to me and call me names that's okay, so long as they have sex with me afterwards.   

[zenemu]

I know what you mean, but after so many years of being miserable, now I am feeling better I just want to have a little bit of fun and recapture some of my lost youth.    Once I've had some fun I can start getting serious.

If girls want to be mean to me and call me names that's okay, so long as they have sex with me afterwards.   

Completely missed the point.

[Remission]

Women don't like me, because I am like a 'teenager', and because I don't know how to talk to them, and they get disgusted for some reason, so my only option is to live behind a veil of fantasy. 

[MM]

I quote this from fiona as to back up what zen is saying.  Thats because the maturity gap between girls in their 20s and you is huge, we don't want to date a 14 year old who has seen his first porn magazine.

[Remission]

I quote this from fiona as to back up what zen is saying.  Thats because the maturity gap between girls in their 20s and you is huge, we don't want to date a 14 year old who has seen his first porn magazine.

F'uck off. 

[zenemu]

Women don't like me, because I am like a 'teenager', and because I don't know how to talk to them, and they get disgusted for some reason, so my only option is to live behind a veil of fantasy. 

Again, I am probably going to kick myself for this later on but it obviously needs spelling out....

Life isn't the porn movie you seem to want to believe it is. Talking to women isn't really any different to talking to a guy, they are people too after all. Most women simply appreciate being listened too rather than being gawped at and being bombarded with your usual constant sexual innuendo. Nobody finds that amusing but you.

I hate to burst your bubble, but not every woman that looks at you is assessing you as a potential mate. Sure women can be attracted by things they see, but generally women are nowhere near as visual as men. For most women, sex is a holistic experience, involving imagination, emotion, fantasy and affectionate needs, and if you had actually understood Freud, you would perhaps understand that. Glancing at you in the street, is simply being human and checking to see if they know you or subconsciously checking whether you pose a potential threat or not and a smile is simply there to placate that action.

Frankly Remission, you could be the living embodiment of Adonis, and will still fail to attract women if you come across as a jerk (or even worse creepy, which I’m afraid you do on here quite often). I agree with what MM has said, women won’t be attracted to someone who is so immature about women and sex. The only way you are going to change that is by spending some time in the company of women. Its up to you to change it, so stop blaming the rest of the world, stop blaming women and start looking in the mirror, because it is your hole and you dug it yourself.

[Remission]

Again, I am probably going to kick myself for this later on but it obviously needs spelling out....

Life isn't the porn movie you seem to want to believe it is. Talking to women isn't really any different to talking to a guy, they are people too after all. Most women simply appreciate being listened too rather than being gawped at and being bombarded with your usual constant sexual innuendo. Nobody finds that amusing but you.

I hate to burst your bubble, but not every woman that looks at you is assessing you as a potential mate. Sure women can be attracted by things they see, but generally women are nowhere near as visual as men. For most women, sex is a holistic experience, involving imagination, emotion, fantasy and affectionate needs, and if you had actually understood Freud, you would perhaps understand that. Glancing at you in the street, is simply being human and checking to see if they know you or subconsciously checking whether you pose a potential threat or not and a smile is simply there to placate that action.

Frankly Remission, you could be the living embodiment of Adonis, and will still fail to attract women if you come across as a jerk (or even worse creepy, which I’m afraid you do on here quite often). I agree with what MM has said, women won’t be attracted to someone who is so immature about women and sex. The only way you are going to change that is by spending some time in the company of women. Its up to you to change it, so stop blaming the rest of the world, stop blaming women and start looking in the mirror, because it is your hole and you dug it yourself.

You haven't said anything I don't already know - and plus, you don't even know me, and plus, the things I write are amusing for many people - but not all, and I don't give a f'uck about those who don't like it.   

Yep, I'm hawt ... and the cute girls want me.