shallow

[Nie]

In romance and such, people say that rejecting a person merely because the person is physically undesirable is shallow and wrong and all the evil in this world, but is that really so wrong and unfair? Or this is just the bitter statement of those who were rejected?

everyone has their own wants dont they, I mean... come on, even those who were rejected have their own tastes and limits.

[Remission]

Are you smarting because you think no guy wants to be your boyfriend?

Most young women without a boyfriend are in a very sorry state.   

[Nie]

in truth i just em.... saw this question on another forum. yeah, sorry no originality.

[Felgen]

I don't consider it wrong to reject someone who's ugly (the OP is not ugly). Looks are an indicator of good genetics and what we perceive as "attractive" are manifestations of good health, fertility and so on.

[Nie]

felgennnnn i didnt say I was here

I guess big boobs means plenty of milk for the new born baby in the future and big hips also mean well easier child delivery - or so I think that was the logic back then.

[Remission]

felgennnnn i didnt say I was here

I guess big boobs means plenty of milk for the new born baby in the future and big hips also mean well easier child delivery - or so I think that was the logic back then.

And what about men with large penises?  Why do women prefer them?

[Nie]

coz their husband has a small one... ok sorry that was a poor attempt at humor.

thats not always true, im pretty sure thats a completely relative - relative to... things that are biological in nature, i mean...

[garga2]

In romance and such, people say that rejecting a person merely because the person is physically undesirable is shallow and wrong and all the evil in this world, but is that really so wrong and unfair? Or this is just the bitter statement of those who were rejected?

everyone has their own wants dont they, I mean... come on, even those who were rejected have their own tastes and limits.

Looks are a generic indicator of health, also people are programmed genetically to look for certain traits.  Your attraction switches are unconscious and most women couldn't tell you why they find someone attractive, they may be able to give you a list but then there might be two guys with the same qualities but one makes her heart melt and the other doesn't.

Attraction is not a choice it is a highly subconscious evolved system.

People who meditate and train against their worldly desires actually do have a point:  That most people are slaves to their mammalian impulses of their nervous system and never question them at all, the truth is the feelings and things the mammalian brain cannot be trusted often times.

If more people took a skeptical approach to what they naturally feel and think and do the opposite and challenge their assumptions and stick with people or things they at first don't like they would be surprised if they just kept up the effort.

99% of the people on earth won't do that though hah.

[Zara]

Looks play a role in attraction. (Unless you're blind)

It isn't wrong... People have their preferences. You can't help what you're physically attracted to and aren't. Some people place more importance on it than others, but that's up to the individual.

[zenemu]

Men tend to be more visual than women, but that isn't always the case. Visual attraction tends to be a relatively superficial thing, and certainly not something to solely base a relationship on that may last the next 50 years.

[Zoe]

right on. why should you try to date someone you arn't attracted too? one wouldn't call a gay person shallow if they didnt want to date someone from the opposite gender.. same rules apply.

[Aspergers Girl]

If I fall for a person it's never for their looks. I like their looks of course, but if they had the same looks and a different personality they are a no go.

[mr-understanding]

Thats a good point you have have made! I found as Ive got older that liking
someone just for there looks is a purely a lust thing not a love thing, but often not looking into their personality and just pursuing someone for thier looks is quite often a red flag and a recipie for a  relationship disaster, if it becomes a relationship.

[Felgen]

felgennnnn i didnt say I was here

I guess big boobs means plenty of milk for the new born baby in the future and big hips also mean well easier child delivery - or so I think that was the logic back then.

Breast size (like big eyes, rounded hips and so on) is an indicator of femininity. A feminine women (i. e. a woman with a high estrogen production), will be more fertile and will typically produce a more healthy offspring than a masculine woman.

[Lynn]

Different people have different preferences.  Someone you find unattractive, someone else may find perfect.  So why chain yourself to someone who you find ugly? They should be free to find someone who likes the way they look.

Some of my friends are married to men that I think are really ugly. They don't think so at all!

I won't apologize for my preferences.  I'm not going to struggle in a relationship with someone that the thought of touching makes me want to throw up.